Want To Introduce Your Depressed Friend Into Skateboarding With His Therapist’s Approval? Here Are Deck Styles To Choose From

Considering you are an avid skateboarder, and your friend’s therapist’s advice is to distract him from depression, you can try inducting him into the world of skateboarding for the first time.

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Since the resurrection of skateboards – and longboards – in the 1990s, people seemed to be continuously delighted to the sports. It’s something that we’re all thankful for because skateboarding and longboarding are just some of those activities that will be able to give us such a thrilling experience. Not to mention, the feeling of going downhill at high speed and flipping through the air with a board under your feet can bring joy into your friend’s depressive life.

“Depression and anxiety are an example of the way our body speaks to us. ” –Stacy Donn Cristo, LMHC

In case you want to help the depressed fellow, you may give him a crash course about the various deck styles that he can choose from according to the skateboarding or longboarding style.

Competitive

Competitive skateboarding is similar to park skateboarding in such a way that both styles get performed in an enclosed space. From its name itself (competitive’), its edge is that riders do their tricks in exchange for a prize, e.g., cash, trophy, or medal. There is also a jury who will judge their abilities.

Cruising

This deck style is perfect for skateboarders who want speed as they cruise through the ramps or sidewalks or just about any place without an obstacle. The idea is that the rider should be able to glide (no other tricks) for as far and as long as he or she can without having to stop to gain momentum. Also, some individuals travel using pintail or fishtail longboards since it’s a convenient form of transportation and traffic-free.

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Dancing

There had been some discussions that the dancing deck style came from the boardwalk-style for surfing, but no one proved this claim. Nevertheless, the rider has to perform various walks and turns and spins for it to be called dancing. Among all those moves that enthusiasts have developed for this specific style are Choppin’ the Wood, Spin Big, Cross-Stepping (Peter Pan), and The Shanker.

Freestyle/Freeriding

If downhill racing is one of the oldest competitions, freeriding is the oldest of all styles. For skateboarding, watching a lot of people do freestyle is the happy part of any game as riders tune in their moves and tricks to their chosen song like a great ballerina. Meanwhile, freestyle is probably known as freeriding when it comes to longboarding because the boarders are free to ride their longboards however they want. Aside from that, some decks are specially made for freestyle, so if you are into it, make sure to get one.

Park

This skateboarding style is designed for a controlled area, such as a skate park, and the obstacles are combinations of vert and street skateboarding since they make use of rails, half pipes, quarter pipes, and stairs. Since park skateboarding constitutes doing tricks in an enclosed recreation area, the skateboarders still need a narrower type of deck that can make the riders’ flips much easier for him or her.

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Downhill Racing

Many like the feeling of going fast down a slope or terrain because it can give them a sense of freedom; that’s why downhill skateboarding is one of the most enjoyable activities to try. Not to mention, it’s among the most ancient of them all as some enthusiasts say that it is being done since the 1970s. It is where longboarding and skateboarding meet. After all, downhill racing may be part of skateboarding styles, but it uses longboards even before. Drop-through (trucks situated in normal position) and top-mount (trucks right at the bottom) longboards are the types of decks that are perfect for this style.

Slalom

If you have ever tried doing the waltz, you will know what you have to do when you are already on top of a longboard and about to slalom. The reason that those two unrelated things follow the same principle: to change steps to be able to move around the whole space. In slalom, the skateboarder has to swerve around all the prepared obstacles that he or she will see along the way. For pedestrian slalom, in particular, he or she has to knit in and out of hindrances that are located on an ordinary location.

The type of deck for slalom is directly proportional to the length of the course that the rider has to accomplish. Meaning, the longer the path is, the longer the deck should be. The shorter the track is, the shorter the board should be.

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“Depression is exhausting to the person suffering from it. Just accomplishing the bare minimum can seem like too much work.” –Kurt Smith, Psy.D., LMFT, LPCC, AFC

Final Thoughts

If you want to see your friend get better and stay away from his depressive thoughts, skateboarding or longboarding is an exciting activity to suggest to him. It is an excellent source of distraction, in the sense that it will pump his body with adrenaline and (hopefully) be able to allow him to heal from depression. Nonetheless, before that, you should help him choose the best deck style.

On the other hand, your friend may also benefit from talking to a therapist online through BetterHelp. It is an online platform that is dedicated to assisting and guiding individuals into understanding their mental health issues and living with them with acceptance and love for self. Watch client success stories on this link to get a better perspective of what this mental health tool is all about.

“Someone who’s socially isolated and doesn’t have a lot of social contacts may not feel lonely at all, but someone else may feel lonely even when they’re surrounded by lots of people,” –Amy Sullivan, PsyD.

 

Good luck!

The New Kid In School

Being the new kid in school is always terrifying. There’s this anxiety or fear that crawls up in you whenever you think about getting surrounded by different people you don’t know. There are times that it’s hard to make new friends as well because others seem to establish a group of their own. There’s this perception that being the new guy will always end up hanging out with the (sorry for the word) “rejects.” With that, specific social issues such as bullying get instantly expected. Continue reading “The New Kid In School”

How To Care For An Introvert Loved One

 

We all know individuals who think and act differently, and they sometimes make us judge and feel discouraged about wanting to be with them. It could be a family member, a friend, or someone we know. Admittedly, we somehow think about the lack of connection due to some weird stuff that the particular individuals used to do. The seriousness, arrogance, and aloofness make us wonder why we are spending time with those people in the first place. But instead of thinking ways to ditch individuals, who are practically different, why not try and understand the nature of introverts? Why not instead of continuously complaining about how hard it is to get along with them, we allow ourselves to learn to care for them?

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Accept Them For Who They Are

Introverts know that they are different from others and they accept that. These people know their personality and set limits as to where they should or shouldn’t be. It’s not as if they always choose to be like that at all times. Most of them wish to become more social and healthy like any other person. Therefore, there’s not a thing that will allow others to outgrow them just because society thinks they are different from the rest. But before introverts grow and become the person they want to be, extroverts need to do something for them. They need to help introverts cherish their personality and unique traits.

Acknowledge Them For Their Positive Aspects

People might not agree, but introverts are generally loving, helping, and caring people who always put others first. Some people may not see it because these individuals always stay away from the limelight, but it’s the truth. Extroverts should appreciate them for their kindness, thoughtfulness, and willingness to help others and not judge them by their perception of isolation. Introverts are understanding people who respond and help others whether it’s for a social cause or something unknown. As long as they value you as a family or a friend, they will stick with you no matter what. Introverts do not expect something from others, but they seek acknowledgment from those people close to them. They don’t help and care for others only to get recognition. They do it because these people feel the satisfaction of providing good deeds.

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Do Not Push Them To Their Limits

It’s normal for extroverts to become risk-takers and that’s fine. However, it’s not okay when they push introverts into things they don’t usually do. That is one of the bad habits of extroverts that make introverts lock themselves all over in isolation again. Although the intentions are acceptable, it doesn’t work as easily as that. Instead of creating a difference, an introvert may only feel pressured and uncomfortable in social situations. Therefore, it leads to the hesitation of trying things for the sake of experience. It is not wise to push an introvert into something they don’t emotionally want, literally need, or mentally uncomfortable doing, not until they are ready to take the risk. Not until they are prepared to challenge themselves to explore and test their capabilities and limits. Just allow introverts to have their space and time.

Always Prepare To Give Back

Compared to extroverts, most introverts are sensitive and good listeners. Usually, they don’t like to speak, but they are undoubtedly quick to listen. However, it doesn’t mean they don’t want people to hear them as well. Because even though introverts are silent most of the time, they still want someone who is willing to listen as they share their thoughts and ideas. It’s extroverts’ responsibility to give back and be good listeners too. Since introverts are always there for people who need them, they deserve to experience the same thing. They don’t need to tell what they want because these individuals’ are caring too much. Therefore, people should practice the art of giving the favor back.

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Accommodate Introvert People’s Differences

The way extroverts and introverts feel, think, perceive, and make decisions vary from one person to another. There is no chance that these two different types of people share the same qualities. For example, extroverts with full energy tend to spend time actively engaging in social activities. They continuously find an opportunity to hang out with friends and seek happiness in things they do. But introverts, on the other hand, spend their energy by isolating themselves and consuming time alone. But note, it doesn’t mean they don’t find happiness in going out. These individuals only want to use their time and energy in the company of those people they love and are close to them. That’s because they believe that happiness is different from what extroverts thought it could be.

On the other hand, your friend will understand himself more and accept his uniqueness if he talks to someone who knows more about his mental health problem. Let him reach out to BetterHelp, where experienced counselors are committed to finding ways to heal and live with purpose. Check out this site for more information on what to do and how it works.

To most introverts, happiness for them is helping others or making others happy. It is their way of achieving a sense of satisfaction. So for those extroverts out there, take care of your introvert loved ones.

 

5 Fun Activities You Can Do With An Introvert Friend

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Going outdoors and going crazy with friends are fun things to enjoy, especially when we are young. We usually go to the movies, swimming, drinking, and many more. It’s all about the laughter and the crazy moments. However, sometimes in our circle of friends, not everyone is as adventurous and outgoing as everyone. Some are introverts who prefer to be in solitude. Often, they are hard to invite over because as much as they want to spend time with friends, they prefer to stay at home doing peaceful activities. So, how do you go about making and remaining friends with an introvert?

Continue reading “5 Fun Activities You Can Do With An Introvert Friend”

How To Spend Time With Boring Friends

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Let’s be honest. There is always a situation when you hang out with friends and don’t feel the vibe. There is still a time that everyone sits around the couch while continuously refreshing their social media accounts on their phones. It’s like you are having people beside you physically that are absent in both emotional and mental aspects. In that case, here are the things you can do to reach out to your boring and annoying friends.

Ask Them What They Want To Do – This question is a bit tricky because you might not get an expected answer. Some of your friends might not have an idea, or even if they do, they won’t tell. Therefore, a specific question is a must. Ask them an inquiry that is answerable with a yes or a no. Let’s say for example their interest is in watching a movie, baking, playing video games (https://www.familyhype.com/children/childrens-products/games/wii/wii-games-for-kids-of-all-ages.html), hang outside, drink beer, and so on. Always aim to create a question that allows activities to fit in.

Talk About What Interests Them – It may sound sacrificial in a way. That’s because you’re not only letting them have their moment, but you’re also sacrificing your attention solely to be able to please them. It may not apply to all, but it’s one way to deal with dull friends. As long as you envision your friends to cooperate, there is always a possibility of a good conversation. You’ll never know where the discussion might lead you. All of you might end up sharing life stories, experiences, and adventure that everyone can learn a lesson with.

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Make Them Feel Comfortable – The more you imply how tiresome your friends are, the more they will keep doing what they do. When you allow a slight chance for them to know that you are somehow disappointed with them, it will freak them out. The more they get an uncomfortable time with you, the easier for them not to cooperate. Therefore, always make sure that they feel relaxed at all times.

Never Force Them To Do Something – People don’t like it when you force them to do stuff they don’t want to do. As far as the boring friends are the concern, never insist on setting up ideas they know nothing about. And even if they do, don’t think that it will automatically make them feel interested immediately. Some people limit themselves in doing things they both like and dislike. So never make a move in insisting what you like, unless it’s agreed upon.

Always Allow Options – In dealing with friends, who seem to have their world, allow them to refresh themselves. It may take a while, but your friends will eventually look for something to do that involves you in it. Since most of these boring people love to spend time in a particular activity, they have limited options. From there, make them think through the stuff they like that you can also agree on doing.

Be Patient All The Time – Dealing with people who don’t seem to know what “bonding” feels like is a bit frustrating. However, you have to remember that not all people are alike. There are the ones that share the same view as yours, and there are those who don’t seem to care. But with all stress and unrecognized effort, you need to be patient with your friends. That’s the best way you can win them over.

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You may think that your boring friends take everything away from you, but they don’t. It only shows they have a different taste of bonding and it may differ from your ideas. However, it doesn’t say they are not lovable. Because when you think about it, it doesn’t matter whether your friends are boring or not. What will matter most is how you spend quality time while getting to know more about each other.

Sports: Its Value On Friendship And Mental Health

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I had a lot of friends when I was younger. I always hang out with them all the time and even after school. We do a lot of fun and cool stuff like a walk through our way home, ride a bike, practice skateboarding, explore the woods, and even ding-dong-ditch some people’s houses. It was so much fun, and I feel so alive at that time. However, things change when I grew up. I eventually lose interest in participating in tiring stuff. I started to dislike doing things that require a lot of body movement. From there, I slowly dropped my friends one by one. So I began to evaluate stuff around me and questioned myself “how did that happen?” Not long enough I discovered it was all because of sports.

How It All Started

When my friends began doing tons of sports, it felt like I don’t belong to them anymore. Since I don’t want to be involved in any activity that requires me to run or walk fast and throw or jump high, I chose to be alone all the time. But it’s not that I didn’t try to approach my friends. I do respect their love and enthusiasm for sports. However, it is not my thing, so I barely talk about it when I’m with them. I admit I get annoyed most of the time because that’s all they can think and talk about. That kind of not-so-close relationship didn’t go well. Still, it all went down to me ditching them because I can’t hang out and do sports at the same time.

“There are many examples of physical activity that range in levels of intensity from light to vigorous. Maintaining your physical health can include yoga, bike riding, jumping rope, engaging in sports, running, walking, jogging, skiing, dancing, tennis, and gardening.” –Marjie L. Roddick, MA, NCC, LMHC

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When I noticed that I was living in isolation, I hated sports more than ever. I blamed it for the things that are happening to me. I became anxious and depressed that I don’t want to go to school anymore. I started playing video games and spent time with the computer for an extended period. But there’s this one time that I invited them over to our house for a sleepover so I can start bringing back the old times. But, they all refused because they said they have to practice. That time, I feel completely ignored and alone. I feel like I don’t fit into anything just because I don’t like and don’t want to try doing sports. I begin to hate and feel bad about myself.

“Just like our feelings give us information about our needs, so do our bodies through physiological feedback,” –Eliza Chamblin, LCSW

One day, one of my old friends asked me to hang out with him, so I did. He said he was concern about me because I don’t go to school often anymore. We had a casual conversation, and out of the blue, he dared me on a race. I was thrilled to the idea that I’m talking to him so I said yes without thinking that I might be running. I was sweating and panting after a long run. But I realized running made me feel different. It somehow boosts my energy, gave me a good feeling, and makes me happy. That’s where I decided to try sports. What can bad happen if I try it for the first time?

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Fast forward to the present day; I now enjoy sports. I actively go to the gym five times a day to work out and spend weekends with friends. Also, we’re all part of the basketball team at school, so I get to hang out with them all the time. If there’s one thing that I learned from that experience, it is the importance of being physically active. Yes, you might enjoy some things alone, but it will never be enough without friends to share that happiness with. It is essential to stay healthy in the emotional, physical, and mental aspects.

As an adjunct to sports, one can also find guidance through an online app called BetterHelp. Here, you can reach out to a certified and experienced therapist that has specialized in the particular mental health issue that you are concerned with. There are different ways to get counseling, which are all easy and convenient for you. Learn more about it through employee reviews here.

“Exercise is key; speak to your primary care physician to see what kind of physical activity is right for you.” –Amanda Zayde, PsyD

 

 

How To Make New Friends

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When we talk about friendship, it’s not always about whom you have known the longest. It’s about who came in your life and never left you since then. The insightful idea of this kind of relationship is a bit stereotyped because of the most common generalized view of friendship. However, when it comes to analyzing who you are, taking an inventory of the people you spend time with is crucial in determining it.

We all have a ton of people that we know and even shared a moment with them too. But as you mature, you become closer to a certain number of individuals whom you share more common things with. The limitations now bring problems, especially when they are nowhere near you in times you needed someone. Though it doesn’t imply an end in a lasting relationship, the need to look for new ones becomes a reason to do so. So how do you make new friends? Here’s how.

Spend Time Around People – It may sound too typical, but it’s the best way to meet new people. If you happen to isolate yourself, you’re never going to make new friends. Therefore, you need to get out of your comfort zone and embrace a different kind of world. Experience things far beyond what you already know and spend time with people that can contribute something in your personal development. Just be social.

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Join A Group Or Organization – When looking for friends, you always have this idea of sharing the same thing that interests you. By that, you can find a group, club, or organization that makes it possible. The idea here is you’re going to socially do things you like while doing it with people who also enjoy the same thing. It is a great time for bonding because it doesn’t require you or them to make adjustments at the beginning of the course of friendship. It creates a good impression.

Consider Volunteering – When you think about it, doing something good for the community allows you to gain friends. From there, you are going to find a lot of individuals who share the same values and commitment you have. You are going to develop a bond or a conventional rotary because all of you are working toward achieving the same goal. Everything in what you do will mean something not only to the community but for other people that surround you as well.

Begin A Conversation – Nothing beats a good and honest conversation when you are aiming to have friends. Talk to everybody. The majority of individuals you’re going to talk to might not feel excited or comfortable as you are, but some of them will be glad to spend time exchanging ideas with you. There is always a person that will stick with the conversation. From that moment, you are beginning to get something out of it – friendship.

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Appreciate Small Talk – Small talk is a crucial component of creating a new friendship. Sometimes, a conversation will not last if nothing is interesting to discuss. So it is necessary to note that a simple appreciation of other people’s point of views, interests, and ideas is a game changer. Spending time with new people do not need to take long hours. A small quality talk is enough to create a good impression towards friendship.

When making friends, there is always a slight chance that people might not like you. But don’t think about it as something that will stop you from making new ones. The proper attitude and right amount of sense of humor sometimes do the trick. And of course, the honesty and sincerity of wanting to be friends with them is a plus.

How Social Media Impacts Friendship

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Since we currently live in a world that spends too much time on constant communication, the internet becomes a necessity. No matter where in the world our friends are, and how long it’s been since we’ve seen them, it’s not going to be a problem. As long as they continuously stay active on social media, we can always keep up and stay in touch. But as far as “connection” is concern, is social media capable of strengthening a bond or does it influence people to become more shallow and unpredictable?

There’s a limit on how many people we can maintain our relationship with depending on how socially capable we are. Many of us can have a hundred close ones within the parameter. The numbers can potentially go up depending on the environment, status, beliefs, and other factors. However, in social media, we can have the ability to extend friendship over thousand of numbers.

There are categories as to where friendship reaches its connection. Based on the studies, three categories segregate the level of intimacy and closeness of two or more people. The specifications explain what type of friendship can become a standard in social interaction.

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  • Active – If we are regularly in touch with a person and can openly express emotional sentiments even if they are not around, then they are the active ones. The indication of knowing pretty much everything about their lives keeps them inside the circle. Commonly, these people are currently within reach. But there are also those who are living far from our area and manage to stay relevantly connected.
  • Dormant – It is common to have a history of secured friendship with a bunch of people. However, they become dormant friends when we somehow lose the communication with them. These types of friends happen when someone moves away to a distant location. However, it doesn’t limit its reasons there. There are also instances that we might both live in the same area but doesn’t feel like hanging out again.
  • Commemorative – These types of individuals in our lives happen to be important. They may have significant value in our earlier experiences, but we didn’t expect their friendship to last. Sometimes, it never crosses our mind to see or hear from them, even ever again. Though we do remember them on some occasions, we know they firmly belong in the past.

Social Media Changes Friendship

The categories of friendship were precise, but not until social media intercepts. Let’s say the relationship of active friends become more active that it started to create an influence with or without a required presence. Though it may sound good for some reasons, it still adds complication to some instances. It encourages over-closeness that hinders us from knowing and spending time with other people. It somehow locks us in a specific connection due to too much activeness.

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For dormant and commemorative cases, on the other hand, it can potentially become better. The history of friendship can start a new series due to the accessible way of communication. Aside from keeping up with the posted information on their pages, we can instantly send a message that will start something. An example is a simple “hi.” The message can make a difference in the long-lost connections we have with our dormant and commemorative friends.

More of our dormant and active friends become commemorative when we get older. That’s because the span of friendship naturally fades. Even if we love spending our childhood and adolescent years with tons of people, the adult days are different. But with social media, the connection remains intact. It somehow brings people closer together.